Re-write

            Kopchak had lived around here all of his life. His and Thompson’s properties abutted Kopchak Road, named after his great-uncle. Kopchak didn’t know much about lions. In fact, he’d been a seventh-grade science teacher up until he retired four years ago. He had, however, heard, that it was unwise to look them in the eye, and that if you ran away they had a tendency to chase you. Settling on what he considered a brisk walking pace for himself and Red he headed towards the barn, and only looked back once. The lion was in the same place as a moment ago, on the other side of the fence, though it was obvious that the animal could get over said fence anytime it wanted to.

            That was all the five of them learned before they were urgently redeployed to the southern end of the property where some cats had been spotted readying to cross the boundary fence. A male African lion was the first they had to deal with, he managed to run between some junk cars after the first shot. The hillside had dozens and dozens of old cars and RVs and tractors parked in clumps of rusted metal, weeds growing around them. Other escapees spread across the hillside, and they began to engage the animals from seventy to a hundred yards away, from the elevated position of the truck, firing on the animals two at a time until they went down. Kanavel's tactic was to shoot for the head a couple of times, and then move on to the body and keep putting rounds into it. "I was sick, shooting these animals, because they didn't ask to be there," he says. "And, you know, I'm a cat person."

In this passage, try to tighten the writing while advancing the action:

            When the 911 operator asked for her first name, Mrs. Kopchak answered "Dolores," the name on her birth certificate but one she never uses: "I've been called Dolly for eighty-four years."

            Her son remained trapped in the barn. From there, looking through a north-facing window, he watched the menagerie grow.

I really only touched the underlined areas. It was so great to begin with, I feel as if I've only butchered it.

Skloot vs. Didion

http://www.observer.com/2010/culture/joan-didion-not-born-blog

1. Didion is by far my most favorite Nonfiction writer, and she has zero online presence. The article above is a piece about Didion NOT blogging. In the article Didion says, “It seems like writing, except quicker. I mean, I’m not actually looking for that instant feedback.” I think that the difference between Skloot and Didion may come from age, and a different Nonfiction world. I don't think Didion is necessarily afraid of blogging and twitter, but I'm sure she doesn't find much use from it from the aforementioned comment. In today's world it seems like a crime to not be digitally present. I'm sure if Skloot had zero digital presence there would be some sort of whiplash or repercussions. For someone that was established before Twitter came along, remaining digital-less seems like the best choice. Skloot wins the battle for being so easily accessible to fans.

Tone/Personality of Digital Presence (Rebecca Skloot)

1. I already touched on tone a bit in my first post about the different forms of media. I think Skloot has a very familiar tone, someone that one would feel comfortable approaching. In her actual book Skloot portrays the same kind of qualities to me. Although she seems tough in certain ways, (her persistence is tough!) there is also a softness and goodness to her that is charismatic and evocative. Her online presence only confirms what I already thought, she is the type of writer that you want to sit down  and have a conversation over coffee with. Her Facebook page shows that she is friendly to fans. In her replies she is responsive and warm.

Digital Presence-Rebecca Skloot

1.  *   https://twitter.com/#!/rebeccaskloot

    

   
    I don’t like the use of abbreviations in Skloot’s tweets, such as,  ‘Gr8’ and ‘u’r,’ the use of ‘Gr*’ is especially troubling because it makes me think of Avril Lavigne and middle school.  I understand that these are tweets and that they are only allowed to be a certain length, but they seem unprofessional and make me question her seriousness as an author. Twitter, however, is a great place to make contact with other writers. 

2.             * http://scienceblogs.com/culturedish/

      This blog works really well. It shows up to date stories about the Lacks’s, it has stories about                       current happenings in the science fields, and the blog format allows for bigger posts. This format works because we can see things Skloot is interested in, and we get more information (which would seem near impossible) about the Lacks’s and their story as it continues to change and grow. It also shows that she is still interested in the subject that she spent so much time on, and that she is looking at the world through a similar lens.

3.             *  https://www.facebook.com/rebeccaskloot

          I think this is such an important platform and one that works really well for any public figure. Facebook is such an interesting tool for anyone that is slightly famous, because they are able to get MASS feedback. For some reason, I feel that people are slightly more voyeuristic and/or forthcoming on Facebook than they are on other social sites. Of course there is a drawback to MASS feedback, being that not everyone takes the time to comment insightfully or articulately. However, Skloot seems to be getting decent feedback from the entries I’ve browsed.

          Form 2 and 3 are the most successful at portraying Skloot as an author. I will begrudgingly admit that 1 is good for administrative things; stops on a book tour, where she is/when she is there, things like that. Overall, Skloot’s online presence is pretty rounded. I also find it impressive that she responds to so many people!