Ya'aburnee

Ya’aburnee

Arabic for you bury me.

I wish a word in the English language existed that was this beautiful.

-

And maybe if I

pound my worn feet

against these city streets

long enough

hard enough

they will finally swallow me whole

And maybe if I

forget my name

waste away

well enough

the street sweepers

will take me away with the leaves

And maybe if I

speak to the stars

softly enough

they won't hide from me

and all these rotten wishes

hanging by threads in the night sky

forgotten in murky water

fading in the penned letter of your favorite Aunt

maybe

they weren't in vain.

♥

Because I've never wanted something to be as permanent as this fleeting feeling♥

Airplanes

If I die today,

my heart would beat on

inside that cage of yours.

Separate and yet the same

against the bones

I clung to

and called my own.

Brand New

Do you remember purple stripe smearing

Tears that crinkled as they bled the colors

Of your stupid ninja turtle sheets

Goodbyes to match the weather

Outside the trees bent to fate’s command

Our hearts perfect without pockmarks

Unaware of the months to come

The lonely tides that ripped us out to a sea

Of frothy closing time drinks

The pretty shore

Taunts us

With what we used to be

I smell summer

Summer scares me

a simple secret

that season is so sad with no one to hold

Smile reminds me of chalk stained hands

lemonade stands

and other uncomplicated things

But I use the wrong adjectives

and I skirt tentatively around the truth

Mind full of buried memories

that will never bloom

Dormant

pregnant with the fear of discovery,

deep in the soil that is our past

The wind makes an orchestra out of the trees

bow differently now

without the family tire-swing

Gravel paces

not welcome in my thoughts. no.

I seal this wet lying mouth

words scratch the back of these teeth

Summer eats me alive, devours me whole

,spits me back out as the leaves begin to change

and the air smells of bonfires and the promise of new

Summer leaves me at the foot of the driveway

with a box of promises and a grave peck on the lips

Returns to find me changed in ways I could never explain

Shame

It could have been romantic.

Without the clammy palms,

and that stupid half-smile

that seems to be your favorite accessory.

Tilting my head back to view the city shaded stars,

offering you these lips that never learn.

One step, two step

with eyes full of vampire facts and silly fear

a stain of brilliant magenta

crept across my face like a disease.

Girls shouldn’t chase boys

I want to rip that smile from your face.

Scraps

Letter,

the one that collects webbed secrets.

__

World tinted

the strangest colors.

A walk obese with storm cloud breath

hands itch for your lifelines.

__

A perfect recipe

pretty words churn

from your painted mouth

lies flutter so easily

ribs

like shutters-

this gossamer heart

unravels from the beginning.

__

& I’m left with a bag full of fortunes

silly scraps.

Today

I'm

going

home